Tuesday, October 7, 2008

run right back to the start.............

Two post in two days I'm so proud of myself. A friend of mine got me thinking upon affection and relationships today. I think their a beautiful thing to think about but it's hard for me to understand at this point in my life. I'm just a kid, albeit a big kid but I'm so in love with everything I meet and that is a lot of the reason why I'm not chasing after the first girl I meet. The longer I'm single the more I feel it is going to be incredibly hard to find someone. I'm picky but I think that is pretty good thing itself. I find myself knowing quickly when things will work or fizzle quickly. I'm very much a hopeless romantic at heart but a man that keeps his feelings away yet on my sleeve all the while. I think sometimes people confuse this for a certain self confidence that could easily be mistaken for arrogance. It's really not that at all, I'm just the way I am and I stopped fighting the way i feel things so deeply a long time. Relationships are defiantly the same way. I treat relationships as a deep and involving waltz that we can never fully understand. I think as much as we figure it out then we still have that much more to learn. I think we have a lot to learn form those that have gone before us and made something beautiful. I think we also have a lot to learn from the stories that we have in the bible. Stories such as Hosea that truly demonstrate authentic unconditional love. Anyway I've just been thinking I suppose and that is always a good thing.

Here is another piece of "Home"

Sunlight shown through blinds
Another night in a chair
Another day by your side
I wish I knew you could hear
Me say “I love you”
Over and over again
There nothing more I can do
But to pray that this would end

and you’re still fighting
So there is hope for us still

And while you were sleeping
I was dreaming of something
The kind of thing that they write books about
I know your sick honey
But when you wake up
I’ll sweep you off your feet and never let you go
I’ll never let you go again

Doctors make their way in
Same old story we don’t know
We’ll ill stand here to defend
Till you truly show
Some sign of life
Breathing in air to your lungs
And then we could try
To start back where this begun

And I know you can hear me
So I beg you dear
Don’t you leave me
Here alone in my fear
Cause my life was you
And I’ll never get it back
Without you

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