stranger than fiction.....

go see it if you haven't already. its very good and insightful. highly recommend it. OK I'm done and going to bed. sorry for the lack of post(as if anybody actually reads this)

the theory of love......

so I've been thinking about love alot lately not because I'm in love but because Ive tried to lock down what love truly is. is it the feelings you have for a girl you just met a week ago? is it the thing that parents show when they put up with so much of the crap that you give them? is it the feeling you get when you finally buy something you've wanted for a long time? these things may sound ridiculous but when were honest with ourselves this truly is what we cherish, treasure, and ultimately love. i think we(myself included) have missed the point. love isn't temporary love is eternal and decides who we eventually become. the bible says that to give love to others you must first know and love God. Ive become truly convinced that until i love God with all my heart that i wont find the one or truly give out all the affection and honesty that I'm capable of. its strange that i can walk by a person that I've never met before and know in my heart that I'm supposed to love them. i want to scream out to them "i love you" but i wouldn't be being honest because i don't know or understand love completely. God has a plan and for that I'm thankful because to be honest with you i feel so completely lost right now. not because Ive lost sight of God but because I'm at such a crossroads in my life right now. College is incredible and truly a one of a kind experience. but college is also very hard and if i didn't have God here with me i wouldn't make it, I'm really learning to depend on him more than ever, I'm so thankful for this because i know hes teaching me and this time hes got my full attention. for the first time in a long time i might add.
so for what its worth, to anyone that might eventually read this i love you

Is your love really Love?
Is my love really Love?
I think our love isn't Love,
Unless it's Love to the end.

the beginning.......

so im finally giving into the blogging nation.....this is going to be sort of a journal/music/thoughts/and anything else i feel post worthy.

So topic of the day, I wrote something recently i'd like to share:

Were gaining speed now/tumbling over pages that we read/always a story/always a way/to burn your enemy/always a place/always a time/I've got a figure/stirring in my mind/i've got an answer/ falling so short

cause when i die/ ill have a tourch in hand/ill have a reason to live/and something to die for/ cause im not worthless/My God, im not your enemy anymore

you've got it so wrong/but it feels so right/and i cant stand up to that/what is this fix that you seek/ill give you a drug/to tie your love too/before we get it/we shall surely pass away

straighten your eyesight/keep your burdens/on your shoulders/there yours to bear alone

and in the mist of all of this/i ask myself/what is love/the echo comes screaming back/this is not your end

"this song was written about how i try to put my struggles on myself and my blame on God when i fail, its a fine line to walk but someday ill be better at it than i am now and that is where this song is resolved with the hope of changing"